To be really honest, I haven't felt like myself for the past week or so. It takes me forever to fall asleep. My moods have been up and down. Granted, it was "that time of the month" last week, so yes, I have to cut myself a little slack.
I also think I have a bit of the post-holiday blues. From Thanksgiving till now, I've been going nonstop. Then it's all over with and you think, "Now what?" The very same thing happened to me after our wedding was over with. I was in the same frame of mind for about a month after that. Eventually, I accepted that it was over with and I found other things to focus on.
I think that some of my depression is normal. But I also think that some of it is not. So, being the proactive person that I am, I called my doctor this morning and I will fight tooth and nail to get on a name brand form of my antidepressant. Right now I'm on the generic and it just isn't working. The same thing happened with my thyroid meds. I was so tired of my regular doctor that I went to see an endocrinologist and she immediately put me on Synthroid. What a difference! I feel so much better now.
I refuse to sit here and not feel like myself. Usually, I keep myself busy until that "icky" time passes. And it does. We all have hormone fluctuations. I think I'm just more sensitive to mine.
So what do I do? Well, I continue to enjoy life and do everything possible to make myself feel better. Today, I will teach Body Flow. I will enjoy the sunshine. I will talk and play with my kiddos. I will pick up around the house. I will try my hardest to do all of the things that make me "me". Soon things will be better. I just know it. I have faith in God and I pray constantly. He will get my through the rough spots.
When having my pity party, I also stop and think about how lucky and blessed I am. I think of all of the others that don't have it as good as I do. I think of people with bigger problems.
I think from now on I will make a "thankful" list on the dark days. That should perk me right up. And if it doesn't do the trick right away, that's fine. At least I know that even in such a rough spot, I can find things that will lift me up and make me feel better.
Thanks for reading. I know that this was a more different post for me. ;)
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4 comments:
I'm sure some of it is also from sleeping later while the kids were out of school. It's enough to keep you from being tired at your usual bedtime, and then you don't sleep as soundly, either, because you're off your schedule.
i understand. the first of the year is always a let down. i love the holidays, seeing all my family, all the fun and of course all the food. then Jan 1 arrives and the house decorations come down and its like, what now. Just think, spring is just around the corner!
Thinking of you.
Thanks ladies! Today I made an appt. with my doctor. I'm almost out of meds. anyway and need to go in. I'm going to ask him to switch me to the name brand. My appt. is on Friday morning. I'm so used to Zoloft, so this should do the trick....
It's nice to know that all of you care and that I'm not alone....
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